my dad and i remembered by having lunch and making a quick visit to the cemetery with kate and sarah. it's been awhile since i went to the cemetery and even longer for kate to go (to be honest, all kate does when we go is try to rob all of the graves of their decor. it's embarrassing). in that time kate has really grown and come to understand a thing or two. so, when we started to pack up and i told her we were going to visit grandma sally, she was confused.
"we can't see grandma sally, she's in heaven and we can't go to heaven!" she protested.
she was right. i told her so. i told her that grandma sally's spirit was in heaven and that her body was at the cemetery and that we were going to visit it.
"her body?" asked a perplexed kate, "where is her body?"
"when you die, your spirit goes to heaven and we put your body in a box and bury it in the ground," i explained, suddenly mortified by our ancient custom (but seriously, what else would we do with it?) kate, too, was horrified.
"YOU BURIED GRANDMA SALLY UNDER THE GROUND?"
then kate wanted to know what a spirit was. and i couldn't, for the life of me, figure out how to tell her. i started a time or two but i just didn't feel like i was doing a good job. what is a spirit? so i called in reinforcements: i asked my dad to help.
"well, kate, "my dad said, "your spirit is the part of you that laughs and loves and when--"
and then kate was crawling away crab-style saying, "i'm a kate crab."
my dad stopped, looked at me and said, "did she just say she's a kate crab?"
kate continued to happily crawl like a crab away from us and i felt disappointed in her lack of interest in a conversation i had felt to be so real. we went on to the cemetery where we talked some more about where grandma was, what she might be doing and why we did not remove any of the really fun decorations from the other graves (in the car i caught her snuggling with a styrofoam egg she'd snitched from a cemetery by the car.).
however, days later our home teachers showed up to teach us a lesson about the holy ghost. as one explained that the holy ghost is also called the holy spirit, kate suddenly shouted, "THAT MEANS HE DOESN'T HAVE A BODY!!!!"
you guys, she does listen. and she remembers. while this fact is both terrifying and reassuring, let's focus on how it is reassuring. this parenthood thing, on some super small scale, just might be working, kate crab or no.