Wednesday, December 17, 2014

my joke

one time i was in ventura and i saw a homeless man holding a sign. it read, "a joke has been played on the children of men." naturally, i stopped and asked him what his sign meant. he told me a lot of things that led me to this conclusion: he was crazy and his sign made no sense.

fast forward to me being the mother of four children and my husband works all day and i have to get dinner on the table in a timely manner because they need to go to bed at a timely hour and also they're all infested with rabies. at least it feels that way. then this poor man and his sign, "a joke has been played on the children of men" suddenly seems to apply to me. because i am a child of a man. and this has got to be some sort of sick joke. like the hunger games. or torture. YOU GUYS.

there i was, up to my elbows in enchilada sauce, ready to roll those tortillas full of chicken and refried beans and cheese and then stack them-- but wait! ava's got a question! about her homework! this makes no sense! and then suddenly, AH! AVA HAS A QUESTION! ABOUT HER HOMEWORK! IT MAKES NO SENSSSSSSSSEEEEE-- just kidding! she understands what they want her to do. oops!

meanwhile, kate is pushing chairs around the kitchen so that it is loud and i can't hear anything and also so that they are always where i least expect them and i trip often and unexpectedly. she also wants to help. she also wants me to tie an apron on her. she also wants to eat everything she can. she also hates what i am making for dinner and wants me to make something else. like sour cream. and chicken. and nothing else. and also, can she help? mom? can she? can she? MOM CAN SHE?

and then there's sarah: having been deprived on a regular nap, and having weaned herself of her second nap, she is exhausted. and bored. because her best playmates are both suddenly busy. and so is her mom. and she needs her mom. badly. why isn't her mom holding her? MOM! MOM! MOM! HOLD ME! HOLD MEEEEEEEEE!!!

and of course, there's seth. he's built a lot of lego-y type things and displayed them proudly on the dining room table. some are close to the edge, which is perfect because sarah can reach items close to the edge. as he feverishly, yet carefully, moves his creations to his bedroom, sarah, in a form of protesting her mother choosing to make enchiladas over holding her, is dashing what she can reach to pieces with an angry sense of triumph. seth is howling in protest. he is also managing to tease kate, which makes her howl, too. i guess misery DOES love company.

you guys, i barely made it out of there alive.

i did exclaim a few times, "this is madness!" or, "i need you not to need me right now!"

ava also exclaimed a few times, "sarah sure does scream a lot!" and, "but i need your help with this questionnnnnnnn,"

at one point i yelled, "HOW IS THIS REAL LIFE?" and, "I JUST WANT TO MAKE ENCHILADAS!!" (confusing the neighbors) but that only made kate cry louder/harder because she HATES enchiladas and why can't she just have sour cream for dinner?

lesson from this experience? i'm not quite sure. here are some potentials:

don't have four kids.
make your dinners at five in the morning, when no one is awake and just pop it into the oven at dinner time, so you don't have to make stuff when your kids are around.
hire a babysitter so you can get dinner made.

my favorite? laugh. so you don't die. then write about the madness on your blog so others can commiserate with your pain (leave your commiseration in the comments).

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

monthly challenge pt 2, bokeh

 this month's challenge: bokeh (the beautiful blurry circles that light turns into when it's out of focus)

i used the christmas tree...because what photographer doesn't shoot a blurry photo of their christmas tree this time of year (the jewish ones, i think)? and i tried it twice: once in the day and once at night. obviously the tree during the day looks more traditional, but there is something so abstract about my tree during the day (shot against a brightly lit background). i really love it.

want to see what the others captured?

Monday, December 15, 2014

music monday- the veggie tales, silly songs with larry

when my brothers were little they watched a LOT of veggie tales. this song was one that my sister and i found quite amusing and were known to sing at the top of our lungs...and i still sing it at the top of my lungs. especially the "BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAAAAAAAAAAS!" part. 

Sunday, December 14, 2014

4 on the 14th

Thursday, December 11, 2014

lessons from the yoga mat pt. 2

it was upon moving from plank to cobra to downward dog that my teacher stopped us all and had us try again. and again. and again.

"is this hard?" she asked us.

um, yeah, barbara, it is. because plank is close to torture. and repeated plank is ridiculous. so i think i grunted a yes.

"try squeezing your thighs around an imaginary block," barbara prompted, "squeeze the back of your thighs to the front, feel your bones with your muscles!"

if you're wondering, reader, yes, i'm aware of how weird that sounds. but i did it. at least, i think i did. then i planked and moved to cobra and then down into downward facing dog.

and you guys, it worked. it was easier!

the rest of my class i thought about delegation.

some of us are good at delegation. some of us aren't. some of us consciously delegate. some of us do it without thinking. some of us can't bring ourselves to do it at all. when i think of the plank i think about my arms and my stomach. i think about how i used to have an incredibly weak core and i couldn't do a plank for very long because i would shake and it would hurt. when barbara encouraged me to use my legs--something i never considered to be a part of the plank, the whole thing was a lot more manageable. i lasted a lot longer.

"your legs are the strongest part of your body," she told me. "why wouldn't you use them to help out?"

you guys, she's right! why go in to something using the weakest part of your body? why not involve the whole body? why not utilize your strength? there are so many parallels to life in this lesson.

involve everyone.
use your strengths.
many hands make light work (or many limbs, i should say).

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